Tag: humor

I have to return some videotapes...

Better a witty fool, than a foolish wit....

If you say ‘we’re in this together,’ I’m going to hurl....

Hello Dad! It is now three in the morning. Do you know where I am?...

Because teachers, no matter how kind, no matter how friendly, are sadistic and evil to the core....

It is very useful, when one is young, to learn the difference between “literally” and “figuratively.” If something happens literally, it actually happens; if something happens figuratively, it feels like it is happening. If you are literally jumping for joy, for...

It is a damn poor mind that can think of only one way to spell a word....

Drinking is fun! It makes me feel horrible and sexy!...

Fall off your own roof....

I feel about Photoshop the way some people feel about abortion. It is appalling and a tragic reflection on the moral decay of our society…unless I need it, in which case, everybody be cool....