Tag: humor

To answer your question, you want me because I’m made of awesome....

They say that ‘Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.’ Well I think the gun helps. If you just stood there and yelled BANG, I don’t think you’d kill too many people....

A melancholy-looking man, he had the appearance of one who has searched for the leak in life’s gas-pipe with a lighted candle....

Writers don’t make any money at all. We make about a dollar. It is terrible. But then again we don’t work either. We sit around in our underwear until noon then go downstairs and make coffee, fry some eggs, read the...

Why are you limping like that?’ Nicholas demanded.’I’m swaggering,’ I informed him.’You look like you’re wearing a diaper.’Charming. And I had a crush on this guy.Wait. I had a crush on this guy?’Now what?’ he asked. ‘You’re making weird faces.”Nothing,’ I...

Never call anyone a baboon unless you are sure of your facts....

Brianna dropped the skateboard in front of Sam. “Don’t worry: I won’t let you fall off.” “Yeah? Then why did you bring the helmet?” Brianna tossed it to him. “In case you fall off....

What ho!” I said.”What ho!” said Motty.”What ho! What ho!””What ho! What ho! What ho!”After that it seemed rather difficult to go on with the conversation....

why can’t you see i’m a kid’, said the kid.Why try to make me like you?Why are you hurt when I don’t cuddle?Why do you sigh when I splash through a puddle?Why do you scream when I do what I did?Im...

Is there any point to which you would wish to draw my attention?’ ‘To the curious incident of the dog in the night-time.’ ‘The dog did nothing in the night-time.”That was the curious incident,’ remarked Sherlock Holmes....