Tag: humor

Nothing travels faster than the speed of light, with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own special laws....

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time....

No sight so sad as that of a naughty child,” he began, “especially a naughty little girl. Do you know where the wicked go after death?””They go to hell,” was my ready and orthodox answer.”And what is hell? Can you tell...

You can only be young once. But you can always be immature....

Why do people say “grow some balls”? Balls are weak and sensitive. If you wanna be tough, grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding....

Maybe our girlfriends are our soulmates and guys are just people to have fun with....

Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on TheeAnd I’ll forgive Thy great big one on me....

I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early....

The longer and more carefully we look at a funny story, the sadder it becomes....

I’m tough, I’m ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, okay....