Tag: humor

Tell the truth, or someone will tell it for you....

This life’s hard, but it’s harder if you’re stupid....

If the world were merely seductive, that would be easy. If it were merely challenging, that would be no problem. But I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world....

Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results....

My girlfriend is a party girl angel who can kick some arse and cook....

I have made a lot of mistakes falling in love, and regrettedmost of them, but never the potatoes that went with them....

A perfect person is easy to love. But when somebody likes all your imperfections, well, that’s when you know they really mean it....

Marriage is not a process for prolonging the life of love, sir. It merely mummifies its corpse....

Books are to me as homemade tattoos are to an inmate. Can’t get enough of them....

I never understood how men could remember all those details about sports but, yet, were incapable of remembering where they set their car keys or wallet....