Tag: humor

Sometimes losing a pet is more painful than losing a human because in the case of the pet, you were not pretending to love it....

To me, nudity is a joke. I don’t think nude people are very attractive at all. I like my women fully clothed. I like to imagine what might be under there. It might not be the standard thing. Imagine, stripping a...

Unrequited love is so boring. Weeping under a blue-black sky is for suckers or maniacs....

Me,” Artemis blurted. “I’m the nut.”Artemis could have sworn the squid winked at him before bringing the five-ton chunk of spacecraft swinging down toward the morsel of meat in its blue shell.”I’m the nut!” Artemis shouted again, a little hysterically, it...

I didn’t think about being king,” he said, his voice hoarse.Eddis stared. “Your capacity to land yourself in a mess because you didn’t think first, Eugenides, will never cease to amaze me. What do you mean you didn’t think about being...

Do you know, sire, I think that if we live to tell our grandchildren about this war, they will accuse us of making it up.’ -Marielle...

When I die of heart failure the next time you frighten me like that, you can put that on my gravestone—‘I didn’t mean to startle her....

I wish we could make out in your bed.”Noah sighed. “As do I, but I’m afraid we have ritual burning to conduct.””It’s always something.””Isn’t it though?...

Insanity does NOT run in my family. It strolls through, takes its time, and gets to know everyone personally. —T-SHIRT...

Yes Headwoman Azaze. But I never lie to Rosethorn. She, um, discourages it.””Evvy and I have an understanding.” She grabbed the teakettle and poured hot water into the mug. “She tells me the truth, and I don’t hang her in the...